Joan Reeves: July 2026

8 MORE UNIVERSAL LAWS OF LIFE

Welcome back! Last week, I started a list of 8 UNIVERSAL LAWS OF LIFE. Go ahead and click on the link to read the first 8 "laws" I found.

During the last week, I found a few more of these amusing "laws" to tickle your funny bone.

If you're having a bad week, I hope this bit of humor will improve your spirits. If you're having a good week, then this will make it even better. Enjoy!

9. Coffee Law

As soon as you sit down to a cup of hot coffee, your boss will ask you to do something which will last until the coffee is cold.

10. Law of Physical Surfaces

The chances of an open-faced jelly sandwich landing face down on a floor, are directly correlated to the newness and cost of the carpet or rug.

11. Law of Logical Argument
Anything is possible if you don't know what you are talking about.

12. Brandolini's Law

The amount of energy needed to refute nonsense is an order of magnitude larger than is needed to produce it.

13. Brown's Law of Physical Appearance

If the clothes fit, they're ugly.

14. Wilson's Law of Commercial Marketing Strategy
As soon as you find a product that you really like, they will stop making it.

15. Hanlong's Law

Never attribute to malice that which can be adequately explained by stupidity.

16. Typography Law

If you write an article critiquing editing or proofreading, there is guaranteed to be a glaring typo in your own work.

TAKEAWAY TRUTH

If you know any of these funny so-called laws, leave a comment with the law so we can all enjoy it.

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Review - The Old Way - Prime

If you're a fan of westerns set in the Old West, you may like THE OLD WAY, a flick starring Nicolas Cage that's streaming free for subscribers on Prime, Hulu, Disney, and Roku.

It can be rented on YouTube, Apple, Fandango, and Google Play.

QUICK BLURB

The Old Way, a 2023 American Western film directed by Brett Donowho, from a screenplay by Carl W. Lucas, is a revenge movie starring Nicolas Cage as Colton Briggs, a retired gunman intent on hunting down the outlaws who killed his wife.

Seemingly amoral and with no conscience, Briggs cared only for his wife. Beyond that, he relates to no one, but his young knows how to get him to allow her to accompany him as he tracks down the killers.

The story is as much about Briggs's odd personality as it is about his quest for revenge. As the two journey together, Briggs is as dependent on his daughter as she is on him.

The Old Way was theatrically released by Saban Films on January 6, 2023, and received mixed reviews by critics. I seem viewers will also have mixed reviews about it because it's definitely not a traditional view of a leading character in a western.

I think it was obviously aimed at the video market from the get-go because Cage, although an excellent actor, can't pull in an audience for a theatrical release. Marketing departments know this as do the producers so you won't get the production values of a top movie release. Still, it's better than many other movies circulating on the streaming platforms.

TAKEAWAY TRUTH

Like westerns and want to watch one? I found this one had a few surprises.

Saturday Share Recipe - Southern Corn Cakes

Good morning! Today, I have a very old recipe to share. It uses AP flour with the addition of baking powder and salt.

If you want to use self-rising flour and self-rising cornmeal, both of which have baking powder and salt added, remember not to add the baking powder and salt in the recipe which is added for AP flour and plain meal.

These corn cakes were what people cooked and ate a couple of hundred years ago when cornmeal was more plentiful than wheat flour.

Wheat generally requires colder climates than the warm South. Even though wheat was grown in North Texas, corn was the most stable food crop grown throughout the South.

The reason is practical and easy. Corn could be eaten fresh or canned. It could be dried and ground into cornmeal. grits, or corn flour. On a very limited basis, it was sometimes fed to cattle and pigs, but it was predominantly a human food source.

Corn Cakes can be eaten like pancakes with warm maple syrup, or as a * bread, much like cornbread, to accompany a savory entree. So let's make some!

SOUTHERN CORN CAKES

Ingredients

1 cup AP flour
2 cups plain cornmeal, yellow or white
1 1/2 cups boiling water
1 3/4 cup milk
4 teaspoons baking powder
1 1/2 teaspoons salt
3 tablespoons fat (Neutral cooking oil for a pancake like result or EVOO or traditionally, bacon drippings or lard, for a savory result.)
2 eggs, beaten

Presto Electric Griddle
A WORD ABOUT GRIDDLES

I have a stovetop griddle that came with my gas range. It fits over the large oval burner in the middle, but I seldom use it.

Why, you may ask? Because my electric griddle works better at maintaining a consistent temperature. My electric griddle is several years old, but it's a Presto and is like the one shown here that's sold on Amazon. The one shown has more than 31K reviews averaging 4.7 stars.

Now, on with the recipe.

Directions

Grease the griddle to be used to cook the corn cakes before you begin mixing the batter.
In a bowl, mix the flour, 1 cup of the cornmeal, baking powder, and salt in a bowl.
In a separate, large bowl, place the other cup of cornmeal and carefully pour the boiling water over the meal. Whisk carefully to combine.
Add the cold milk and blend.
Now, slowly whisk in the beaten eggs to the mixture, combining each small addition so the eggs don't scramblle.
When finished adding the eggs, slowly add the dry ingredients from the first step, blending well.
Finally, add the 3 tablespoons of fat and mix well.
Heat the griddle. When hot, pour the batter onto the hot griddle. The amount used should make a cake about 4 inches in diameter.
Like pancakes, avoid flipping these over until the first side is done. How to tell it's done? The cake should puff up and visibly steam. You should see little bubbles on the top forming as the steam escapes. If in doubt, gently life a corner of the cake to see if it's browned on the griddle side. If it is, flip it and let the second side cook until brown.
Serve hot.

* SAVORY CORN CAKES

These are delicious made as is and served as an accompaniment to Chili, Stews, Charro Beans, or similar dishes.

To kick them up another notch, add a couple of tablespoons of any or all of the following: diced onion, diced green chiles, and/or whole kernels of corn to the batter.

To turn them into a heartier dish, double the amount of the add-on ingrdients, and you can cut them in triangles and serve with a picante dipping sauce.

TAKEAWAY TRUTH

My Dad loved corn cakes. He preferred them over pancakes. If you make them, let me know what you think about them.

Joan participates in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, affiliate advertising designed to help websites earn advertising fees by linking to products on Amazon. If you click an Amazon link in her post, she may receive a small commision at no extra cost to you.

I love to cook, and I love to write Romance Novels about a woman and a man who are made for each other! Sign up today for I LOVE READING, my free Newsletter and receive exclusive content, news about book bargains, and new release notices.

Friday Freaky Facts

I love trivia and often save bits and pieces of weird information. I mean, you may never know when the opportunity presents itself to drop a tidbit into a conversation.

For example, you're at a cocktail party and talking with a bunch of women and men about mundane chores around the house.

Isn't that the time to say, "I too hate vacuuming the carpet and have often wished British engineer Hubert Cecil Booth, who is widely credited with inventing the first motorized, suction-based vacuum cleaner in 1901, had chosen to invent something else."

Now that's a stunner that will make everyone's jaw drop. Right?

With that thought in mind, allow me to share a few equally tasty tidbits of trivia because History is full of quirky little facts. How unfortunate that too many people think History is a bore. It's not. History is the adventurous exploits of the famous and infamous.

Here are a few things I've learned as I research various subjects. Enjoy!

In 1439, Kissing was officially banned in England in an effort to stop disease from spreading. (I imagine the country became a nation of lawbreakers.)

In 1912, a Paris orphanage held a raffle to raise money and gave away live babies as prizes!

John F. Kennedy, Anthony Burgess, Aldous Huxley, and C.S. Lewis all died on the same day.

Once upon a time, Karl Marx was a correspondent for the New York Daily Tribune.

Ronald Reagan was a lifeguard during high school and saved 77 people from drowning.

In 1487 in the Aztec dedication of the temple at Tenochtitlan, 20,000 people were sacrificed.

Romans used human urine as mouthwash.

A 19th century popular medicine for kids was Mrs. Winslow’s Soothing Syrup which had morphine as an ingredient.

In early Rome, a father could legally kill anyone in his family.

Attila the Hun bled to death from a nosebleed on his wedding night.

February 1865 is the only month in recorded history not to have a full moon.

There is no known civilization that did not tax. Even the very first known civilization, the Sumerians, recorded their tax history on clay cones.

In colonial America, pregnant women were not given anything to relieve the pain of childbirth because pain was considered God’s punishment for Eve’s eating the forbidden fruit. (That had to be the Puritans.)

TAKEAWAY TRUTH

Next time your kid bemoans history, throw a few fun facts at them. Maybe it will interest them in the underlying drama that is history.

8 UNIVERSAL LAWS OF LIFE

Has it been a rough week so far? Feeling a little crazy?

Relax, today is Hump Day. That's right, scream with delight and read the funny stuff below. That will help you get to tomorrow.

LAUGHTER REQUIRED FOR LIFE

As an author of Romantic Comedy, I'm here to say that everyone needs to laugh more. Maybe all the discord and anger we see all around us would subside if everyone just laughed—or at least smiled instead of acting as cranky as teething babies.

I'll help you get started. I searched through my archive of funny things and found these Universal Laws of Life.

I don't know who first uttered these witty words or when. I'd love to give them attribution for this list, but these funny words seem to have been floating around the Internet for the last 3 decades.

16 UNIVERSAL LAWS OF LIFE

1. Law of Mechanical Repair

After your hands become coated with grease, your nose will begin to itch. And you'll have to pee.

2. Law of Close Encounters

The probability of meeting someone you know increases dramatically when you are with someone you don't want to be seen with.

3. Law of Probability

The probability of being watched is directly proportional to the stupidity of your act.

4. Law of Gravity

Any tool, nut, bolt, screw, when dropped, will roll to the least accessible corner.

5. Variation Law
If you change lines (or traffic lanes), the one you were in will always move faster than the one you are now in.

6. Law of the Result

When you try to prove to someone that a machine won't work, it will.

7. Finagle's Law

Anything that can go wrong, will—at the absolute worst possible moment.

8. Law of Biomechanics

The severity of the itch is inversely proportional to the reach.

TAKEAWAY TRUTH

I hope that helped. If not, have a glass of wine when you get home and plan some fun for the weekend ahead. Oh, you can also read a funny book like one of mine from the Love, Laughter, and Shenaningans RomCom series. Just saying....

HOT AUGUST NIGHT, a Last Chance Beach RomCom

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Review - Miss You, Love You on HBO Max

Today's movie is an American drama which has probably been called a small film—definitely not a blockbuster—but it has a big message that may hit home to many.

It's not a comfortable, feel good movie, but one that will make you think. You may find yourself wondering if you communicate the way this mother and her son do. If so, you'll be doing some soul searching as to why that situation exists in your relationships.

I don't know that I can say I liked the movie, but I definitely liked the performances by the remarkable Allison Janney as Diane Patterson and Andrew Rannells as Jamie Simms.

Accompanying those 2 lead actors are Bonnie Hunt (love her!) as Judith Bibbs, Oscar Nunez as the Minister, Lisa Schurga as Nance, and Suzy Nakamura as Kathy.

Released in May of this year and screened at Sundance, the movie was picked up by HBO Max for distribtuion. If you have access to HBO Max, I definitely recommend this film which was directed by Jim Rash from a screenplay he wrote.

In case you're a film buff interested in the details, it was produced by Kevin Walsh, Nat Faxon, Gigi Pritzker, and Rachel Shane.

WHAT'S IT ABOUT?

A grieving widow is forced to plan her husband's funeral with her estranged son's assistant.

One sentence that is like the tip of an iceberg, hiding turbulent emotions and painful histories.

At first you'll hate Janney's character, but in the end, you'll understand her and Jamie (played by Runnells) and be comforted by the connection they make that is real and honest, unlike her relationship with her son who communicates by texting.

TAKEAWAY TRUTH

A beautifully acted, heartbreakingly painful movie about relationships gone wrong and the acceptance that can come from acknowledging the truth.

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Saturday Share Recipe - Summer Punch

Summer is when outdoor parties reign supreme. Having something icy cold and easy to serve and drink for all ages means making a punch packed full of tasty ingredients.

This SUMMER PUNCH meets all those requirements, and it's easy to make and easy to store which means you can always have it saved in the fridge.

Ingredients

1 6-ounce can frozen pineapple juice
1 6-ounce can orange juice
1 6-ounce can frozen berry & fruit blend juice
1 2-liter bottle of ginger ale
Orange chunks, fresh berries, fresh mint leaves to garnish

Directions

1. Combine juices in a large pitcher and stir to blend well.

2. Cover and chill in the fridge overnight.

3. If you plan to serve from a punch bowl, pour the chilled mixture into the bowl and add the ginger ale, pouring slowly to preserve the fizz..

4. If you're serving from the pitcher, add the ginger ale as described in the previous step.

5. Ganish with the fresh fruit.

By the way, almost any fruit juice and fresh fruit works for this recipe.

If you have any leftover, simply store in a covered container in the fridge. It may go a little flat, but it will still taste good.

PUNCH BOWL TIP

Here's an easy way to keep the punch, whether in a pitcher or a punch bowl, icy cold.

Freeze a mixture of fruit juice in a bowl or a ring mold if you have one. Place the frozen juice into the punch bowl to keep the mixture icy cold. That won't dilute the flavor of the punch the way ice cubes will.

TAKEAWAY TRUTH

There's something about a punch bowl that just says party.

Staying inside where it's cool? Read a RomCom that will make you smile.

JANE (I'm Still Single) JONES on sale for 99¢.

SASSY, SNARKY, SMARTY PANTS

When I went through my Mom's papers, I found my third grad report card. Wow. Did that bring back memories. Teachers would write a comment on the back of the report card.

That year, my teacher had written: "Joan talks too much in school."

OMG. Yes, I had an unfortunate habit of saying what I thought. I looked at the world around me and always came up with a Dorothy Parker-type comment.

While this gained Ms. Parker the rep of being a biting sophisticated wit, it gained me the reputation of being a sassy little girl—a smarty pants as adults said back then.

I really wasn't trying to be funny. I was just making observations about the people around me and the things they did. To me, it was interesting and often funny.

Unfortunately, adults thought otherwise. Trust me, the often snarky words that came out of my mouth weren't considered praiseworthy by my teachers or my parents.

Looking back on it, I realize my observations were often more adult than childlike because of the sophisticated Golden Age comedies I watched on TV.

Most of those came from playwrights who'd written the story originally as a Broadway play.

Our local library had books filled with those Broadway play scripts. I didn't understand a lot of what I read, but it was definitely informative. LOL.

MY SNARKINESS: BACKGROUND FOR DIALOGUE

Those old movies ad the Broadway plays I read embraced dialogue. If you ever watch the classic films Bringing Up Baby or Pillow Talk, you'll notice the dialogue is out of this world!! What they say, how they say it, and when they say it is absolutlely perfect.

I think this is why I love writing dialogue—especially for heroines who are armed with an arsenal of sass and aren't afraid to use it. All my books—romantic comedies and romantic suspense—have a lot of dialogue, and I love writing it.

Readers often tell me that they laugh out loud at some of the conversations between characters.

In JUST ONE LOOK, I really got into the dialogue. My heroine Psychologist Jennifer Monroe uses words, innuendo, and sexual tension to twist her hero Gynecologist Dr. Matthew Penrose into a pretzel.

A lot of the dialogue in my books is stuff I’d love to say, but never do—maybe because I still hear the voices of my teachers and my parents telling me to think before I speak so I don't sound like a smarty pants.

That's what I do now. I think before I speak and usually come up with a good half-dozen of sarcastic, amusing retorts, but I place those words in the mouths of my characters.

TAKEAWAY TRUTH

I prize being a sassy, snarky, smarty pants now because in my opinion and in my books, sass is an art form.

Need a laugh? Read JUST ONE LOOK, a book that proves, "Seduction and sex can be pretty funny—especially when both sides play dirty in this battle of the sexes!"

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PROGRESS IN SPITE OF DISTRACTIONS

Hurray! I made it to Wednesday. Yesterday was challenging, but then, many days are.

I am dismayed that I haven't finished my book yet, but every time I seat myself in front of the computer, some guy knocks on the back door and says, "Can you go to Home Depot (Lowes, True Value, or Ace Hardware) and get this bolt and nut, this gauge wire, another roll of insulation, another gallon of Kilz, etc.

Seriously, guys putting up a building need a woman on the crew to whip them into shape.

But, I digress... I'm here to help you regain focus and make progress in the face of distrations. although this applies to writing, these steps can be adjusted to whatever your particular project is. Just change the text to fit your situation.

GOING FORWARD WITH SO MANY DISTRACTIONS

When I get to the point where I can't maintain the narrative long enough to put sentences down, I take a step back. This is hard to do when I already feel the pressure to get this book out there, but it's necessary.

Even thought I wrote my first few novels with 4 kids running through the house—shouting, screaming at each other, wanting lunch, snacks, parental face time, etc.—that is no longer the norm.

The kids are grown, and I've become accustomed to a quieter, more peaceful environment.

Yet, I remember what I did back then when distractions and interruptions were the pattern of a summer day.

6 WAYS TO WRITE WITHOUT ACTUALLY WRITING

(1) When you write every day, it's easy to keep the scope of the book in your head. When you're not writing every day, the project can go stale, and you may lose your enthusiasm for it.

That's not good so set aside at least 2 blocks of time—maybe 15 minutes or longer—to think about the project from beginning to end. Focus on what made you want to write the book. Experience the emotions associated with your premise, with the chracters you've created.

No one writes a book unless there is something about the idea and the characters that touches you deep inside. Mine those emotions until you literally can't NOT write.

(2) Use your imagination to figure out how you'll market the book when you publish it. Imagine the graphics you'll use, the teaser text to hook readers. In other words, be thinking about your book and the end result—a published book.

(3) Keep a notebook and pen near by if you can't steal an uninterrupted half hour away from whatever is going on in your life so you can make notes that may pop into your head about the book, the setting, scenes that may be needed, snippets of dialogue you hear in your head when you think about the characters.

(4) Is there any information you need about the background, setting, or characters? Make a metal list about that until you can write it in your notebook.

(5) When you can get to your computer, warm up your engines by using the notes you made to quickly find the information. Be sure to notate the websites or resources you used.

(6) Adopt the habit of writing an affirmation 10 times in the morning and 10 times in the evening that focuses on your writing and/or the work in progress itself.

After a few days, you may find yourself thinking and saying your affirmations when you have to be away from your computer.

Here are a few examples:

"Writing is easy and fun for me."
"Writing makes me happy."
"This book I'm writing is awesome."

TAKEAWAY TRUTH

You may realize that each of these tips are designed to build and maintain enthusiasm for your book in progress so you'll look forward to writing rather than losing interest and wondering why you thought it was a good idea in the first place. Hang in there! Good luck.

Need a little vacation? Read DECEPTIVELY YOURS, a book that will sweep you away to the beach, and it's now on sale for 99¢!

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Review - French Lover - Netflix

Don't be dismayed, but today's movie review is for a French romantic comedy starring Omar Sy as Abel, a dashing but jaded movie star, and Sara Giraudeau as Marion, a down on her luck waitress in a divorce battle with her ex who doesn't watch action movies and doesn't know who Abel is.

I saw a trailer for this Netflix movie and was intrigued. Since most foreign movies one can stream have English audio tracks embedded, it's not nearly as distracting as reading subtitles.

I found the movie to be funny and well-acted. I also found it intriguing to see a romcom aimed at a mostly French audience.

Some of the funny parts tickled my funny bone because they weren't what one normally would see or hear in an American romcom.

Except for Omar Sy, whom I'd seen in another French movie as well as several American films, I wasn't familiar with the cast which I found to be superb. This French romcom had pretty much the same kind of supporting actors as an American romcom featuring a movie star hero: a cutthroat sister, a slightly weird brother-in-law, starstruck mother and father, etc.

There were a few anachronistic bits, i.e., mentioning Jimmy Hoffa in what was supposed to be funny dialogue. In this country, there's an entire generation who wouldn't get that reference. The English translator for the audio track should have known better.

Those English translated bits provided a different kind of amusement, but that didn't take away from the film.

TAKEAWAY TRUTH

All in all, I found the film amusing and entertaining. From an author's perspective, I found it educational as to what the French would find amusing in a romantic comedy. If you have Netflix, watch it. You may find you like it too.

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COME TO THE BEACH PARTY

I need a vacation because I'm SO tired of all the construction here at my hacienda.

Just when I think we're getting close to the finish line, the weather throws a meteorological monkey wrench at is and construction stalls again.

If I can't take a vacation, then at least I can go to a Beach Party in the comfort of my home.

You can come too because I bet you could use an easy and cool getaway too!

BEACH READS AND SUMMER LOVE

Is there anything more fun than a good book on vacation? I think not. If that book is a romance novel, then you're guaranteed to have a good time. So here are the details:

WHAT: Facebook Beach Party

WHO: Hosted by the Romance Gems Authors

WHERE: Romance Gems...Where Authors and Readers Meet

WHEN: Tomorrow, July 14, 2026, starting at 9AM EST and running to 8PM EST

WHY: Because we all need a break and some fun!

HOW TO ATTEND: Go to Romance Gems...Where Authors and Readers Meet and click to join, answer the Participation Questions, agree to the rules, and someone will review your answers and give you admittance if all is in order.

WHY SHOULD YOU GO TO THE PARTY: You can chat with the Authors "live," take part in the Giveaways, and shop the 99¢ Sale Book Fair.

TAKEAWAY TRUTH

Don't risk FOMO. Come to the party!

Romance Gems...Where Authors and Readers Meet

Author Advice - Why Write Every Day

Writing success is built one day at a time.

A universal truth is: "If you want to be a writer, then write."

To be a "professional" writer, one must write. Not once in a while, but every day. If not every day, then on some kind of consistent basis.

Why?

Two reasons.

(1) It builds the habit of producing words on a consistent basis. If you write 2,000 words each day, Monday through Friday, it's easy to sit down on Monday and do that.

It's not so easy if there are many days since the last time you wrote. You end up wasting time trying to motivate yourself to write.

(2) A novel is a massive cluster of ideas. If you write every day, you have the universe of the story in your head. You don't waste time looking at notes to refresh your memory.

TAKEAWAY TRUTH

Here's another universal truth about writing. Writers write. Those who want to write, but don't, make excuses.

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Saturday Share - Great Dip for 4th of July

Happy Independence Day!

If the weather is good, and not so hot that it cooks your skin, you'll probably be outside grilling chicken, smoking brisket, or doing both along with sausage on the grill and cold drinks in the cooler.

The kids may be outside if you can get them away from video games and their phones to play touch football, toss a softball, or maybe a game of hide and seek if they're still young.

What better way to celebrate this holiday than a recipe that reflects the melting pot we proudly are in this country.

I give you my recipe that will make any party great and will serve as an appetizer to keep hunger at bay until you toss that delicious BBQ on a platter.

OLD FASHIONED TEX MEX DIP

Ingredients

1 16-ounce can of refried beans
1 4-ounce can of chopped green chiles
1 4.5-ounce can pitted black olives, chopped
3 medium green onions, finely chopped
1 cup of sour cream
1 package guacamole mix, any brand that you like
1 medium tomato, diced
1 cup sharp cheddar cheese, grated
1 large avocado, pitted and mashed
1/2 cup Picante Sauce, of course, my choice is always Pace's
Tortilla chips

Directions

Mash the avocado and combine with the guacamole mix. Refrigerate at least an hour until it's "set" up.
Prepare the rest of the ingredients while you wait. Drain and chop the green chiles. Chop the black olives, green oinions, and tomato. Combine the olives and green onions in a small bowl and mix the tomatoes and chiles in another bowl.
Shred the cheese.
When the guacamole is ready, remove it from the fridge. In a large shallow dish, layer the ingredients in this order: beans, guacamole, olives and green onions mixture, chiles and tomato mixture.
Finally, sprinkle the cheese over the mixture.
Using the sour cream, frost the mixture. Next, drizzle the picante sauce over the layered dip.
Serve with fresh tortilla chips.
Here's a little tip. Warm the tortilla chips. It makes the dip even better.

TAKEAWAY TRUTH

Happy July 4th. Have fun. Be safe.

Prefer to stay inside and read? DECEPTIVELY YOURS is on sale for 99¢.

Difference Between Art and Craft of Writing

What is the difference between the Art of Writing and the Craft of Writing?

THE ART OF WRITING

What is this? It's the creative process of translating emotions, abstract thoughts, and ideas into words that convey meaning to the reader and helps the reader connect with the written text.

I think this could conceivably be viewed in part as the author's voice. How one author conveys an idea is different from other authors. Maybe that certain something some authors seem born with that enables them to easily master the art of writing is akin to being born with artistic talent.

THE CRAFT OF WRITING

This is much easier to define. It's the grammar rules of punctuation, spelling, choosing the correct word, sentence structure, plotting, scene development, dialogue, characterization, and mastering the narrative elements of writing, just to name a few, in order to properly create text that connects with your readers.

Good writing requires both Art and Craft. Learn your Craft and then use what you learned to write 1000s upon 1000s of words. Why? Because Craft can be learned from outside oneself, but Art can only be learned within by writing.

TAKEAWAY TRUTH

Want to be a great writer? Learn everything you can and then write, write, write.

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NO POWER & CENTERPOINT'S AI CUSTOMER SERVICE

July began yesterday with the thermometer on our garage hitting 100° F. I think there was also 100% humidity.

This was the week that the power company began replacing underground power lines in our section of town. What fun this has been!

Since Monday, the power goes off at unexpected times. Usually this happens when I'm frantically typing away, trying to get the words done before I lose the thought.

When does the power return? I guess whenever the heck Centerpoint decides it's time. We're on the text message list for Centerpoint. When they first starting this text alert system, they would actually send texts saying, "We see that the power is off at or near your address." Another text would follow saying why it was off, i.e. "damage to the lines is being repaired."

A while after that, we'd get a text saying, "Power is estimated to be restore by 4:00PM today."

AI OLIVIA

Now, we get no text alerts when the power goes out. We call Centerpoint and get OLIVIA, the AI in charge of customer service who asks why we're calling and gives a list of reasons.

We select Power Outage. Olivia thinks and then tells us she sees that the power is out at our address. Then she asks if we are on their text alert system.

We answer yes. Then she asks if we received a text alert. We answer no. Then the all-knowing Olivia tells us we should manage our text alert settings at Centerpoint dot blah blah blah—which we've done countless times only to discover each time that the proper settings are still in place.

No explanation of why the power is out. No information, estimate, or guess about when power will be restored. Nothing but generic drivel by an AI named Olivia.

The first day the power was off almost 8 hours. We had an electrician working here on our construction. Of course, no power means no power tools.

I went outside to report what I'd learned from Centerpoint aka AI OLIVIA.

As an electrician, I'm sure he has had more interaction with Olivia than I have because he said, "I hate that AI BITCH."

TAKEAWAY TRUTH

Laughing, I agreed. I hate that AI BITCH too.

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