Book Turn-Offs

Call me quirky--and, trust me, many do--but there are certain things I see on book covers and in book descriptions that guarantee I will not buy the book.

I'm sure everyone has their pet peeves about books. After all, books are entertainment, and entertainment is completely subjective. As a reader, what floats your boat may be an anvil through the deck for another reader.

In no particular order, are some of these things in my completely subjective opinion. (Don't toss the online equivalent of rotten tomatoes at my cyber presence. Like those rejection letters from publishers and agents say: "This is just one person's opinion."

Personal Turn-Offs

1. A cover for a book that should appeal to women that has an arrogant-looking man and a submissive woman. Or some element like a big fat cigar stuck in his mouth. Seriously. What woman wants to kiss a man who smokes cigars? Yuck!

2. Any book dealing with any part of the apocalyptic content of the Book of Revelations. Why are there SO many of these?

3. Any book that graphically depicts the brutalization and torture of women and children. Men too, but especially women and children.

4. Any book that makes incest sound like a positive alternative lifestyle. Visit with a few victims who are haunted their entire lives by this, and you might change your tune.

5. A book cover that is supposed to be sexy but comes off as creepy.

6. Books about Middle Eastern nuclear plots against the U.S. Sorry, guys, I know some of these are very good. The writers of 24 should have contacted you guys to give Jack Bauer better story lines, and the series wouldn't have been canceled. But I've reached my saturation level so that's why I'm tossing this cranky plaint in.

7. Saturation level also reached on Tolkien knock-offs, Christian thrillers, and serial killers.

8. Product descriptions with typos or those that being: This book is about... or this story begins. If you're a reader and/or a writer, you know what that means. The writer isn't very good or he'd be able to write an articulate description of the book rather than doing the writing version of hemming and hawing.

Takeaway Truth

Now that I've got that off my chest, I'm going to go have a praline and a cup of coffee for lunch.