A lot of people have trouble with familial relationships during the holidays. The old hurts, anger, and grudges rise to the surface very quickly.
Even the most balanced person can fly off the handle sometimes when a seemingly innocuous remark is made.
We're all adults now, right? It's time to grow up and be the better person. Here are a few positive thoughts to hang onto during the annual pilgrimage home.
I want to quote from a little book I bought over 20 years ago, The Portable LIFE 101, 179 essential lessons from LIFE 101: Everything We Wish We Had Learned About Life In School--But Didn't by John-Roger and Peter McWilliams.
#142 in the book: Your childhood is over. Your parents did the best they could with what they knew. They gave you the greatest gift of all: Life. You don't have to like your parents, but it can help if you learn to love them.
Yes, it's easier to hang onto old hurts, but it's healthier -- for you -- to forgive and let them go.
#12: The good news is that we learn all we need to know--eventually. The bad news: the lessons continue until they are learned.
Good people are good because they've come to wisdom through failure. ~ William Saroyan
#40: Rule #1: Don't hurt yourself and don't hurt others.
If you're in an emotional minefield, guard your words as carefully as you'd guard your footsteps in a real minefield. Don't fall into old patterns of behavior and spout off the same old words. If you want a situation to be different, you must act differently.
If you do not wish to be prone to anger, do not feed the habit; give it nothing which may tend to its increase. ~ Epictetus
If all else fails, try acceptance.
#54: Acceptance is such an important commodity, some have called it "the first law of personal growth." Acceptance is simply seeing something as it is and saying, "That's the way it is."
Do you have a plan for keeping the peace during holiday visits with family?
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Remember, to continue doing the same old thing and expect a different result is the definition of insanity. Choose a different path.