Quote for the Week
"There are people who live lives little different than the beasts, and I don't mean that badly. I mean that they accept whatever happens day to day without struggle or question or regret. To them things just are, like the earth and sky and seasons." Celeste De Blasis, Wild Swan, 1984.
Do you have someone in your life who is a black hole of the universe? They just suck the joy out of you, suck the energy out of you, suck the life out of you. I do. It's a relative whom I love, but I don't enjoy which means that we both lose in a relationship in which I maintain contact out of a sense of responsibility.
If you have someone like that, how do you cope? Over the years I've tried pointing out the extreme negativity this person exhibits. I've suggested professional help to deal with the raging case of unhappiness and depression, but all is to no avail. My attempts are met with a cycle of indignation, rage, tantrums, and tears.
After a few decades of this, I burned out. My relative will never change because the person does not see there is a need to change. I've become philosophical about this and just do my best to be a good person and not let the black pessimism affect me. I finally accepted that you can't change another person or make another person happy no matter what you do.
Within Each Of Us
Change can only come from within, just as happiness or sadness does. We all have a choice about how we will react to life events, how we will feel, what emotions we will dwell on. I knew this all along. Finally, I got tired of jumping through ever multiplying hoops in an effort to make another happy. Finally, I accepted the situation, the person. Just the way the person is.
A life truth: it is what it is.